A long time ago monkeys didn't have tails. But one faithful day, the stupidest monkey on the entire planet climbed a cactus to attempt to eat an owl. After the owl flew away, the stupid little monkey climbed out on to one of the cactus's limbs and prepared to leap to another cactus. At the exact moment he leaped his flabby bottom got caught on one of the cactus's spines. He fell off the cactus and hung from its branch. He hung there a long time eating bugs and drinking cactus juice. After about a year his rear end had been stretched into a tail. Gathering all of his strength he reached up and pulled his newly acquired tail free from the spine. This was a very tall cactus and when he loosened his tail he fell over 20 feet to the ground. He landed with a thump. The stupid monkey broke one of his arms and both of his legs. He very weakly crawled into a nearby forest to rest.

That is why monkeys have tails.

Once upon a time there were animals and birds who lived together and there was a bat. Bat lived out side of the cave.

One day a war started between animals and birds because an animal killed a bird by accident. So animals and birds fought each other. When the birds were winning bat helped them and when the animals were winning he helped the animals.

Soon they stopped fighting and they celebrated by having a party and bat came.

When the birds saw the bat they said "Hi nice to meet you again" and then animals said " How did you know this animal? "and the birds said " He is not an animal, he is a bird " and a bird told an animal what happened during the war.

So they got very angry and they threw stones at the bat. Then bat flew away to the cave and he never came out and after this he only came out at night.

Once a long time ago in the darkest Africa, there lived a beautiful colored bird which we now call the crow. It had beautiful colors of pinks and purples and oranges, any color you could think of. But his beautiful colors did not stay that way, for one day in the darkest of nights, snow started to fall (for back then snow was never seen or heard of). The animals scurried into trees and burrows for every flake was so cold. Days and nights came and soon all thought it was a punishment from the heavens. So they all got to gather, and the king of the jungle called out that whoever said they would fly up and confront the gods of this disgrace would become sacred. Soon the beautiful bird of colors volunteered ...

So at night fall he started his journey up to the heavens. When he got to the heavens he asked the gods why he sent these evil white flakes to the Earth. The god answered "It is wise of you to come here and confront me, so take this stick of fire and soon the white flakes of evil will vanish."

So the bird of colors took the stick of fire and flew down to the Earth. When he got there his feathers were singed and black, and his flesh was as black as coal. Soon the white of evil vanished and the bird of colors was sacred - his present from the gods was the power not to be hunted, for he was ugly and his voice made the ugly sound of cawing.

So from this day the crow has not been hunted.

Once upon a time there lived a very importent man in a very small town, he wanted a haircut and in the town there were only two barbers.

The man decided that he would go and visit the two barbers and then he would decide which barber to go to .

The first barber had a very bad haircut and had a very smelly clothes, the second barber had a very good hair cut and was very good looking.

The man did not know which barber to go to so he started thinking and he came up with the answer that the first barber was the one who did the other barber's haircut, so he decided that he would go to the first barber and have his haircut there.

The man told all the people in his town to go to the first barber because he gave a very go haircut, the people of the town decided that they would always go to the first barber and have their haircut there.

The barber got a lot of money so he decided that he wanted to marry his girlfriend, whom he had for a long time, so the barber got married and had 10 children.

"AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER"

A long time ago baboons had hair and fur on their bottoms like any other animal.

Now, the baboon liked to play tricks. He told the birds that they would blow up if they flew up into the air, and the birds stayed on the ground for weeks. He told leopard that his spots were a sign of a fatal disease. Poor leopard stayed in a tree for a long time waiting for death to set in.

One day the baboon thought up a truly horrible prank, he would tie elephant's trunk into a knot. He hid himself in a tree. In the tree he had placed the elephant's favorite food, potatoes.

Soon, the elephant came trotting by. He saw his favorite food hanging in the tree. The elephant wasn't stupid, and he knew that potatoes didn't grow in trees. He also knew that the baboon liked to play jokes. He very carefully approached the tree. When he was five feet from it, the baboon leaped from the tree's branches and grabbed the elephant's trunk.

The elephant was ready and he flung the baboon to the ground. The elephant stepped on the baboon to pin him to the ground, and then began to beat the baboon's rump. He hit the baboon all that day and all that night as punishment for all the mean tricks he had played.

The next day he said, "I will let you go, only if you promise never play a trick again." The baboon agreed and the elephant let him go. The baboon's bottom hurt horribly and all of the hair on it was gone. The baboon was true to his promise and never played a trick again.

And that is why baboons have red rumps.